Humor

Happy Friday!

dogs…

There’s nothing like a good comeback…

best comebacks, funny comebacks, funniest comebacks, funny responses, funny comebacks burns, funniest retorts, funniest comebacks, clever comebacks
best comebacks, funny comebacks, funniest comebacks, funny responses, funny comebacks burns, funniest retorts, funniest comebacks, clever comebacks
best comebacks, funny comebacks, funniest comebacks, funny responses, funny comebacks burns, funniest retorts, funniest comebacks, clever comebacks
best comebacks, funny comebacks, funniest comebacks, funny responses, funny comebacks burns, funniest retorts, funniest comebacks, clever comebacks

Signs…..

Today is the birthday, in 1942, of Corey Wells, part of Three Dog Night. The group had this number one hit in 1970.

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music, sixties and seventies

Thor’s Day

Know your appliances!

Appliances
I bet you didn't see that coming?
20060731.jpg

Advice column…

Dear John,

 I hope you can help me. The other day, I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching TV. My car stalled and then it broke down about a mile down the road and I had to walk back to get my husband’s help.

 When I got home, I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was in our bedroom with the neighbor’s daughter!

 I am 32, my husband is 34, and the neighbor’s daughter is 19. We have been married for ten years. When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted that they had been having an affair for the past six months. He won’t go to counseling and I’m afraid I am a wreck and need advice urgently. Can you please help?

  Sincerely, Sheila

————————————————–

Dear Sheila,

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the vacuum pipes and hoses on the intake manifold and also check all grounding wires. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the injectors.

I hope this helps,

John

Parenting…

r/funny - Ah yes, parenting

Nice…

wonderful images…

Yesterday (yes I know I’m late) was the birthday, in 1809, of Felix Mendelssohn. I like a lot of his stuff but I’m sure all of you will recognize his most famous work. This is a well-done rendition.

and here is the orchestral version which is also very nice.

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music

Wednesday is Cold

Hug Count
xkcd
Thomas Hobbes: "In the state of nature man lives nasty, brutish, and short lives in a war of all against all! "

Jean-Jacques Rousseau: "Wrong, Hobbes! In the state of nature man is free to live simple, peaceful, harmonious lives! They fish, hunt, and live without pride or vanity."

Hobbes: "Wrong Rousseau! In the state of nature if get a fish you are immediately clubbed in the head and your fish is stolen!"
Rousseau: "Wrong, no one steals because they have no concept of envy!"

Hobbes: "In the state of nature you can't ever have a full English breakfast because someone always steals your black sausages!"

Rousseau: "In the state of nature no one will eat disgusting English blood sausages because they eat fresh fruit right off the tree!"

Hobbes: "There is only one way to settle this, we'll visit a primitive village and see for ourselves whose theory is right!"
Rousseau: "Fine!"
Hobbes: "Fine!"

Hobbes: "So? Who was right about men living in the state of nature?"
Native tribesmen: "Well, in a way you are both right. While we mostly live peacefully and cooperate, there is certainly conflict as well. "

Hobbes, annoyed: "Is it just me or in the state of nature do they not know how to dig into a philosophical position and defend it to the extreme?"
Rousseau: "Agreed. I hate it."
Existential Comics
Post image

In 1973, Elton John started a three-week run at number one on the Billboard singles chart with this:

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music, sixties and seventies

Tuesday Morning

It’s cold. Learn how to make proper snow sculptures from these Lithuanians.

35 Mind-Blowing Photos Of Snow Sculptures In Lithuania, From Octopuses To A Human-Size Pikachu
35 Mind-Blowing Photos Of Snow Sculptures In Lithuania, From Octopuses To A Human-Size Pikachu
35 Mind-Blowing Photos Of Snow Sculptures In Lithuania, From Octopuses To A Human-Size Pikachu
35 Mind-Blowing Photos Of Snow Sculptures In Lithuania, From Octopuses To A Human-Size Pikachu
35 Mind-Blowing Photos Of Snow Sculptures In Lithuania, From Octopuses To A Human-Size Pikachu

More here.

some hair…

commas are important

On this night in 1959, Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens and The Big Bopper all appeared at the Surf Ballroom in Clear Lake, Iowa. It was the last performance for each of them before being killed in a plane crash the following day.

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music, sixties and seventies

Rainy Monday

spellcheck.

itsPeteski
Thank you CDC

Bada bing!

What’s considered trashy if you’re poor, but classy if you’re rich?  Manipulating the stock market.

My friend couldn’t afford to pay his water bill.So I sent him a “get well soon” card.

My mother-in-law drowned in a well.I didn’t know that wells still existed, let alone granted wishes.

My personal trainer said I did so well on the treadmill that next week she’ll turn it on.

I know the guy who invented Cliff’s notes. I asked him how, he said “Well, to make a long story short…”

I’m addicted to placebos. I could quit, but it wouldn’t matter.

I crastinated part-time for seven years before I went pro.

Signs…

On this day (in 1896), La bohème by Giacomo Puccini premiered at the Royal Theater in Turin. Here’s a wonderful bit. Isn’t she amazing?

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music, opera