opera

in Zagreb

From experience…

I’m sure you can figure this out…

The top 12 states to live in, alphabetized:

-Alaska

-Idaho

-Maine

-Michigan

-Minnesota

-Montana

-New Hampshire

-New York

-North Dakota

-Vermont

-Washington

-Wisconsin

Bada Bing:

Do you know what viagra is made of? It’s 50% Miracle gro and 50% Fix a flat.

Hey Walmart, don’t get mad at me if I forget to scan something.You gave me zero training before making me a cashier.

My new tattoo: Leviticus 19:28

Quit messing up!You need to do butter or find yourself marginalized.

Is being a horse trainer considered a stable job?

What do you call a chameleon that loses the ability to change colors?A reptile dysfunction.

Did you know that before water was invented, people had to carry their boats around?

What starts with an “o” and ends with “nions” and sometimes makes you cry?Opinions.

Bacon is 73% fat and very salty.Me too bacon, me too.

Hostess: Good evening. Do you have reservations?Customer: Yes, but I’ve decided to throw caution to the wind and eat here anyway.

Santa has been reading all your posts this year.A lot of you are getting science books.

It’s not a mass firing of unvaccinated workers.It’s an overdue reduction of unsafe employees.

Did you know muffins spelled backward is what you do when you take them out of the oven?

I don’t know who needs to know this but even if a bear wears socks and shoes, he still has bear feet.

Every single corpse on Mt. Everest was once a highly motivated person.

Jacques Offenbach died on this day in 1880. So, for more beautiful music today we have soprano Anna Netrebko and mezzo-soprano Elina Garanca singing the barcarolle from Les Contes d’Hoffmann. Sit back and enjoy!