daily humor

Sunny and THURSDAY today

Today is a public holiday in Iran to commemorate the martyrdom of Imam Hasan al-Askari, the 11th Imam of Twelver Shia Islam, who was poisoned in 874 AD.

Hassan Agari was born in Medina on 8th of Rabi-ul-Akhar 232 AH His father was Ali Naqi, the 10th Shia Imam. Imam Ali Naqi lived under house arrest in a Samarra, a garrison town about 60 miles north of Baghdad. Hassan’s title became known as Asgari, meaning “the one who lived all his life in a garrison town.”

Even from an early age, Asgari was known for his divine knowledge and he became the 11th Shia Imam on the death of his father in 254 AH at the age of 22. Becoming the 11th Imam was a big deal. In both the Sunni and Shia branches of Islam, it is believed that the 12th Imam would be the final Imam who would be the ‘Mahdi’ or ‘Guide’ for humanity until the Day of Judgement.

Askari died aged 28 on 8th Rabi’ al-Awwal 260 AH (January 4th 874 AD) after being poisoned on the orders of the Abbasid caliph Al-Mu’tamid and was buried in Samarra, a town some 60 miles north of Baghdad.

Al-Askari died without leaving an obvious heir, which created widespread confusion and fragmented the Shia community into several sects, all of which disappeared within a few decades except the Twelver Shia. The Twelvers hold that al-Askari had a son, commonly known as Muhammad al-Mahdi (lit. ’the rightly guided’), who was kept hidden from the public out of the fear of Abbasid persecution. Al-Mahdi succeeded to the imamate after the death of his father and entered a state of occultation. His life is said to be miraculously prolonged until the day he manifests himself again by God’s permission to fill the earth with justice. Though in occultation, the Imam still remains responsible in Twelver belief for the spiritual guidance of humankind and the Shia accounts of his occasional encounters with the pious are numerous and popular.


Today is the birthday, in 1943, of Maria Muldaur (Maria D’Amato), American singer, songwriter, who had the 1974 US No.6 & UK No.21 single ‘Midnight At The Oasis’. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bGSRjTchL38

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music, sixties and seventies

Whoa! It’s WEDNESDAY already!!

Today is Ethiopian New Year, a public holiday in Ethiopia. Known in Amharic, the official language of Ethiopia as Enkutatash, this holiday marks 1 Meskerem, the first day in the Ethiopian calendar.

The Ethiopian calendar is a solar calendar based on the Egyptian and Julian calendars and was brought to Ethiopia by missionaries. The year consists of 12 months of 30 days and a thirteenth month of five or six timekeeping days. Pagume, the 13th month in the Ethiopian calendar, comes from the Greek word epagomene, which means ‘days forgotten when a year is calculated’.

Enkutatash means the ‘gift of jewels’. It is said to refer to the Queen of Sheba returning from her visit to King Solomon in Jerusalem in 980 BC. On the Queen’s arrival back in Ethiopia, her chiefs welcomed her by filling her treasury with jewels (‘enku’). It may also refer to the countryside, as this time of year coincides with the end of the rainy season meaning the landscape is covered with Adey Abeba, whose bright yellow flowers appear almost in celebration of the impending harvest.


Google search…


Here’s a fun video from Kylie Minogue https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=POWsFzSFLCE

Posted by Tom in eighties music, Humor, Music

It’s TUESDAY, folks.

Today is Gibraltar National Day. The day commemorates the referendum of 1967, in which the citizens of Gibraltar overwhelmingly voted to remain under British sovereignty.

Coveted since antiquity for its strategic position at the entrance to the Mediterranean from the Atlantic, the ‘Rock’ passed through Phoenician, Carthaginian, Roman and Visigoth hands. It was occupied by the Moors in 711AD. It gets its name from the Spanish version of an Arabic name given to the area during the conquest. It came under Spanish control in 1462 as the Moors were driven out of Spain.

In 1704, Anglo-Dutch forces captured Gibraltar from Spain during the War of the Spanish Succession on behalf of the Habsburg claim to the Spanish throne. The territory was ceded to Great Britain in perpetuity under the Treaty of Utrecht in 1713.

Since it fell under British control, Spain has continued to push its territorial claims over Gibraltar. And although the diplomatic spats of recent decades have thankfully replaced the sieges and military assaults of previous centuries, the Spanish desire to see Gibraltar become part of Spain again remains undiminished.

To respond to the Spanish claims, a sovereignty referendum was held on September 10th 1967, in which voters were asked whether they wished to either pass under Spanish sovereignty or remain under British sovereignty, with institutions of self-government. The voter turnout was 100% with 99.64% voting to remain under British sovereignty.


These make great gifts!

BADA BING!!!

Silly putty implies the existence of serious putty…I believe that’s called C4.

Stop blaming yourself for your problems. Learn astrology and blame the planets.

Still hope that one day I get to ride a kayak while it’s strapped to the top of someone’s car.

Why do they always have 5K runs for charity? Just once, couldn’t they have a sit for charity or nap for charity?

I finally know why they call me a grown-up. I groan every time I get up.

If you live to be 100, you should make some fake reason why just to mess with people. “I ate a pinecone every day”.

I was always taught to respect my elders, but finding one keeps getting harder and harder.

OK, so naked running…Apparently, this means running without GPS, music, or any other tech. I wish I had known this about an hour ago.

When I look back on all the successes and failures in my life, I am grateful that at least the potty training stuck.

My keyboard space bar wasn’t labeled. It is now. I call it “the final frontier”.

I’m organizing a walk for Fat Lives Matter starting at McDonald’s at 11am and finishing at KFC at 11:05am.

I saw an audiologist today, but I think I’ll get a second opinion. Why on earth would I need a heron egg?

The world is not full of assholes but they are strategically placed so you’ll come across one every day.

Adam: The McRib is back. Eve: Stop calling me that!

I’m at the age where it’s considered rude to pull out a bottle of Tylenol if you don’t have enough for everyone.


Some old cars…


Today is the birthday, in 1957, of Siobhan Fahey, singer with British female pop group Bananarama who had the 1984 UK No.3 single ‘Robert De Niro’s Waiting’, plus over 20 other UK Top 40 singles, and the 1986 US No.1 single ‘Venus’ a cover of the Dutch rock band Shocking Blue 1970 hit. Fahey was also a member of Shakespeares Sister who had the 1992 UK No.1 single ‘Stay’. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4-1ASpdT1Y

Posted by Tom in eighties music, Humor, Music

Hello MONDAY!

Today is Knabenschiessen, a traditional celebration in Zurich. Knabenschiessen is a traditional shooting competition for teenagers and is held on the second weekend of September each year. The Monday afternoon is a holiday observed across the city. Even though this is only a half-day holiday, many workers will take the morning as a holiday to create a long weekend or work from home in the morning.

While the date of the first festival is officially 1889, the custom can be dated back to older roots in the 17th century.

The competition is open to 13-17-year-old boys (“Knaben”) and girls in the canton of Zürich. The competition has been open to female participants since 1991.

The shooting within the competition is done with the Swiss Army ordinance rifle, which the children will encounter a few years later as they do their national service.

The competition is held in the shooting range at Albisgütli on the slope of Üetliberg.




Today is the birthday, in 1941, of Otis Redding, American singer-songwriter, record producer. After appearing at the 1967 Monterey Pop Festival Redding wrote and recorded his iconic ‘(Sittin’ On) The Dock Of The Bay’ with Steve Cropper. The song became the first posthumous No.1 record on the Billboard Hot 100 and The Dock of the Bay became the first posthumous album to reach No.1 on the UK Albums Chart. Redding was killed in a plane crash on 10th December 1967. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTVjnBo96Ug

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music, sixties and seventies

Yes, it’s THURSDAY

Today is Jeûne genevois, a public holiday in the canton of Geneva, Switzerland. Meaning Genevan Fast, it is observed on the Thursday after the first Sunday of September. This holiday is related to the Federal Fast, a Swiss government-arranged multi-denominational holiday celebrated by all Christian Churches and the Jewish community.

In 1831, the Federal Fast was fixed in all cantons in Switzerland on 8 September, before moving to the third Sunday in September. Geneva has instead kept to its own date.

Fasting days had been a tradition in Switzerland since the late medieval period. Despite not being seen as part of the reformed Protestant faith, they continued to be observed in parts of Switzerland.

In October 1567, there was a Geneva-wide fast to show support to the Protestants who were being persecuted in Lyon, France. This fast is recognised as the first Jeûne genevois.

In 1869 as a result of the Federal Fast across Switzerland, Jeûne genevois was no longer an official holiday, though it continued to be observed by many Genevans. In 1966, it was reinstated as a holiday. While the religious fasting element is no longer widely observed, banks, most businesses and shops will be closed on Jeûne genevois.

In the sixteenth century, the only food that was allowed to be eaten on Jeûne genevois was plum pie. It remains a treat to be enjoyed on this holiday to this day.


I want to lose weight but I don’t want to get caught up in one of those “eat right and exercise” scams.

Walmart is opening dental offices in some of its stores. They will have an express lane for people with 10 teeth or less.

Woke up this morning and found out that someone had put vegetables in the beer crisper.

You’d be amazed how often I’m wrong when people ask me, “Guess what?”

Accidentally went shopping on an empty stomach and am now the proud owner of aisle 5.

Old age is when it takes longer to get over a good time than to have it.

I joined a dating site for people my age. It’s called Carbon Dating.

Another site I found is called Shingles Only.

When I go for walks I worry about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. But I also worry about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

It’s tough getting older. I went into an antique store and they wouldn’t let me leave.

I went to the doctor because I thought I had arthritis. I don’t, I have early onset rigor mortis.

Yesterday the guy that was supposed to fix my doorbell didn’t show up. Or did he…

A Missionary group visited a Cannibal Tribe in New Guinea. It was their first taste of Religion.

If it’s so great outside, why do bugs try to get in my house?

If I could only use one word to describe myself, it would probably be: “not good at following directions”.

A man going on a honeymoon cruise stopped to buy seasick pills and condoms. The druggist said, “If it makes you sick, why do you do it?”

If you suck at playing the trumpet that’s probably why.

Five out of six scientists have proven that Russian roulette is harmless.

The best part of Kamala’s tax on wealth is if you don’t have $100 million, it won’t affect you. (If you are reading this, that includes you and everyone you’ve ever known)


“I was hoping to find a driverless taxi.” “Would you feel better if I told you I didn’t have a drivers license?

Today is the birthday, in 1946, of Freddie Mercury (Farrokh Bulsara) British singer, songwriter, record producer with Queen. Regarded as one of the greatest singers in the history of rock music, he was known for his flamboyant stage persona and four-octave vocal range. Born in Zanzibar to Parsi-Indian parents, Mercury attended English boarding schools in India from the age of eight and returned to Zanzibar after secondary school. In 1964, his family fled the Zanzibar Revolution, moving to Middlesex, England. Having previously studied and written music, he formed Queen in 1970 with guitarist Brian May and drummer Roger Taylor. Queen had had the 1975 UK No.1 single ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’, plus over 40 other UK Top 40 singles. And the 1980 US No.1 single ‘Crazy Little Thing Called Love’. As a solo artist he scored the 1987 UK No. 4 single ‘The Great Pretender’. Mercury died of bronchio-pneumonia on November 24th 1991 aged 45, just one day after he publicly announced he was HIV positive. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zO6D_BAuYCI

Posted by Tom in eighties music, Humor, Music