Procul Harum

WEDNESDAY appears again

Today is Election Day in South Africa. Like most democracies, South Africa has declared election day to be a public holiday both to make it easier for citizens to vote and to emphasize the importance of this fundamental democratic right and responsibility.


Birds and Bees…

Ridiculous over-packaging…


BADA BING!

A new study finds that married couples have a higher chance of divorce than single people.

Yesterday I gave my food to a homeless person………and today the homeless person gave me a book titled “HOW TO COOK”.

At the library, I asked the librarian if they had any books on turtles “Hardback?” she asked. “Yes,” I said. “and little heads that go in and out.”

It’s the start of a brand-new day, and I’m off like a herd of turtles.

When I say, “The other day,” I could be referring to any time between yesterday and 15 years ago.

I run like the winded.

When you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery?

I don’t mean to interrupt people. I just randomly remember things and get really excited.

When I ask for directions, please don’t use words like “East.”

If people don’t like you, it’s okay. You only need to be concerned if dogs or cats don’t like you.

I’m at that age that the next day my body whispers to me, “Please don’t do that again”.

You guys should see the stuff I don’t post. It sits in a folder labeled I think it’s funny but somebody will be offended.

Stormy Daniels was not surprised Trump’s defense was small and didn’t last long.

Him: How much for the gold circle of death? Her: Sir, those are engagement rings.

When men refer to themselves as “alpha males” I hear that term in the context of software. Alpha versions are unstable, missing important features, filled with flaws, and not fit for the public.

Common sense is a flower that does not grow in everyone’s garden.


Today is the birthday, in 1945, of Gary Brooker, English singer, songwriter, pianist and founder and lead singer of the rock band Procol Harum who had the 1967 UK No.1 and US No.5 single A Whiter Shade Of Pale. (one of the few singles to have sold over 10 million copies) and scored the hits ‘Homburg’, ‘Conquistador’. Brooker founded The Paramounts in 1962 with his guitarist friend Robin Trower and has also worked with Eric Clapton, Alan Parsons and Ringo Starr. He died from cancer on 19 February 2022 age 76. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJxpKlTID2Q

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music, sixties and seventies

celebrate TUESDAY!

Today is the anniversary of the Manifesto of Independence in Morocco. On this day in 1944, 66 members of the Moroccan National Movement signed the country’s Manifesto of Independence and presented it to the French and Spanish colonial authorities, as well as the representations of three global powers—the US, Great Britain, and the Soviet Union.

vote2

Bada Bing!

“Just cleared out some space in the freezer” sounds much more productive than “I just polished off another pint of ice cream”.

Two women who recently died were waiting at the Gates of Heaven. Woman 1: “So, how did you die?” Woman 2: “I froze to death.” Woman 1: “Wow, that must’ve been so painful. I’m so sorry.” Woman 2: “It was, but after a while, you go numb & don’t feel as much. How did you die?”

Woman 1: “Well, I thought my husband was cheating on me. So I rushed home early from work, but he was just playing video games. Then I ran into the bedroom to look for evidence, but I couldn’t find anything. So I ran to the bathroom to search, but I still couldn’t find anything. I even ran outside to the backyard, but I still couldn’t find anything there.”

Woman 2: “So what happened to you?” Woman 1: “I was so exhausted from running around that I collapsed & died.” Woman 2: “Well if you had looked in the freezer first we’d both be alive right now.”

Why do anti-vaxxers not lock their bikes?  Because they know someone who locked their bike and it was still stolen.

I just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax.

I just paid for a 12 month gym membership. My bank just called to see if my credit card was stolen.

I asked my wife what women really want.She said, attentive lovers. Or maybe she said a tent of lovers. I really wasn’t listening.

My therapist: Why aren’t you being honest with me? Me: Because I don’t want to be hospitalized.

Husband: I want you to have this bracelet. It belonged to my mother. Wife: Why does it say, “Do not resuscitate?”

If you can’t find your dog, open the refrigerator door. He’s standing right behind you.

Signzzzzzzz

Today is the birthday, in 1895, of Laurens Hammond, inventor of the Hammond Organ (and many other things). The sound of the Hammond Organ was widely used by rock musicians, including in this piece.

Posted by Tom in Humor, Music, sixties and seventies