Today is Popular Consultation Day in Timor-Leste, a public holiday. This day commemorates the referendum that took place on this day in 1999, paving the way for independence from Indonesia.
First Date Stories
Bada Bing!
So excited for my kids to return to school so I can spend my free time reading the 50 emails their school sends each day.
Grandpa: The internet used to come in through the phone. It made a terrible noise, like robots screaming. Grandson: Hush Grandpa, take your pills.
Parents, please have a respectable email address you can give teachers. ThicknJuicy69@hotmail.com is not a good look.
Texas & Florida are removing the alphabet from their schools and are now going back to grunting as a form of communication.
I love how a fly will get into your house through a 2mm crack in a window, but can’t find its way out even if you have the side of your house taken off.
I just got ketchup in my eye. Now I have heinzsight.
Store sign…If it’s in stock, we have it!
So apparently RSVPing to a wedding invite with “maybe next time” isn’t a good response.
A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde. The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her, he said: ‘It’s golf balls’. Nevertheless, the blond continued to look at him for a very long time, deeply thinking about what he had said. After several minutes, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked: ‘Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?’
Today is the birthday, in 1944, of Charles Colbert from the rock band The American Breed. They had this hit song.
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