Today is Liberation Day in Guernsey and Jersey. On 9 May 1945, HMS Bulldog arrived in St Peter Port, Guernsey, and the German forces surrendered unconditionally aboard the vessel at dawn. The same day, HMS Beagle, which had set out from Plymouth, arrived in Jersey to accept the surrender of the occupying forces there. Sark was liberated on 10 May 1945, and the German troops in Alderney surrendered on 16 May 1945.
Motherhood
Jonah’s mother: “That’s a nice story. Now tell me where you’ve really been for the last three days.”
Mrs. Columbus: “I don’t care what you discovered — you still could have written!”
Mrs. Angelo: “Michael, why can’t you paint on walls, like other children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?”
Mona Lisa’s mother: “After all the money your father and I spent on braces, that’s the biggest smile you can give us?”
Mrs. Bonaparte: “All right, if you aren’t hiding your report card inside your jacket, take your hand out of there and show me.”
Mrs. Revere: “I don’t care where you think you have to go, young man. Midnight is past your curfew!”
Mrs. Washington: “The next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance goodbye!”
Mrs. Lincoln: “Again with the stovepipe hat? Why can’t you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?”
Mrs. Edison: “Of course I’m proud that you invented the electric light bulb, Tommy. Now turn it off and go to bed!”
Mrs. Einstein: “But it’s your senior picture, Albert. Can’t you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something?”
Mrs. Locks: “I just got a bill for a broken chair from the Bear family. You know anything about this, Goldie?”
Mrs. Muffet: “Well, if you don’t get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there’ll be a lot more spiders around here!”
Mrs. Kent: “Clark, your father and I have decided to get you your own telephone. Now will you quit spending so much time in phone booths?”
Getting close to wedding season…
Today is the birthday, in 1941, of Danny Rapp, frontman for the doo-wop group Danny and the Juniors.
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